Author John Hohn Shares Loss of Friend With Us...

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Eulogy for Nickie

My wife knew why

I walked over to the chair

By the dining room window

That faced the morning sun.

“I brushed away all the hair from the seat,”

She said.

So gone

Was any trace

Of your final, enfeebled days.

We could lay aside our concerns

About your deafness –

You watched our shoes

Whenever we approached --

And how your eyes teared,

Pupils wide in daylight

Like curtains pulled aside

On a vacant room.

You were content

Only when we held you

Swaddled,

Or when you napped

On the needle point cushion

Of the sunny chair--

Your handsome Persian profile

Calling to mind your vigorous days

Among the leaves

In a back yard wind,

Or nestled

At the base of the embracing oak

When days passed without a scolding

For our tardiness with your dish,

We knew

You were only wandering out a reluctance--

So many soft, careful steps--

As if to let us know,

You, too, felt the burden,

Impending departures always bring,

Of leaving us to ourselves alone--

And of the grief that would seep

Into simple daily tasks

In a home

Echoing with raw fresh emptiness

.

It was the right thing to do,

We both knew,

And when she returned,

From the Vet’s,

My wife looked me right in the eye

And said, “I can still feel his warmth

On the bottom of the box.”

I took the carton from her,

Accepting the last of your dearness

Faintly into my palms,

And I bowed down over you

Clenching my grief

In my teeth.

John J. Hohn

April 1, 2007

Author: Deadly Portfolio: A Killing in Hedge Funds