Every Reasonable Doubt - First in Series - By Pamela Samuels Young!
Labels: Black author, Black characters, Emotionally Damaged, Every Reasonable Doubt, legal thriller, murder mystery, Pamela Samuels Young, racial discrimination civil case
Books, Reviews, Short Stories, Authors, Publicity, a little poetry, music to complement...and other stuff including politics, about life... "Books, Cats: Life is Sweet..."
Labels: Black author, Black characters, Emotionally Damaged, Every Reasonable Doubt, legal thriller, murder mystery, Pamela Samuels Young, racial discrimination civil case
"When in God's Name, will we do what we all know needs to be done!?" asks our President as he speaks to America after still another school mass shooting which occurred recently in Texas...
And then the video above goes on to share that the governor, the past president and a congressman were heading for the national NRA convention where there would never be, if that group has its way, that the ban of military-style automatic guns and, more, a registration of guns in America, for instance, will never take place. All those things that republicans continue to refuse to even consider talking about and negotiating to bring about REAL responses to the horrendous reputation for America being the only country that "hosts" mass shootings!
And the video goes on to say that those suffering from so many deaths are tired of hearing "we will be thinking and praying for you..." THAT IS JUST NOT AN ACCEPTABLE RESPONSE ANYMORE... Yet those of us who want gun reform know that unless the republican party is zapped into a major change--perhaps one that is based upon God's Judgment of those who refuse to stop the flood of dead children down the river of republican stubborness and selfish concern for themselves and power... We have no words that can be given to those with unforgettable and unforgivable hate that has encircled those in power of the party...
And, once again, a writer takes up her pen to spotlight the pain and suffering and the real inability to put such trauma aside and return to a former life that has been so drastically changed... Sala has done an excellent job of placing this last horror and many others school shootings into each reader's memory--a memory that will stand strong as the nation, and each of us, are fighting to force A STOP TO KILLING CHILDREN, just by being willing to acknowledge that the proliferation of so many guns, available anywhere and everywhere...MUST be accepted as the PROBLEM to be solved!
What the hell am I supposed to be learning from all this crap? |
“All of you…those who were not wounded, and those who were…those who we lost, and those who were saved, are heroes because you did everything right. It was the stranger who did everything wrong. But in the midst of all the tragedy, first-grade teacher Katie McGrath shielded two of her students with her body, took the bullets meant for them, and saved their lives, and for that we come today to also honor Miss McGrath. Katie, would you please come forward?”
Katie stood, her knees shaking. And as she began walking toward the podium, everyone in the gym began chanting her name. “Katie! Katie! Katie! Katie!” Boyd held up his hand, then pulled a plaque from a shelf beneath the sound system. “Katie, on behalf of the Albuquerque public school system and Saguaro Elementary, it is my honor to present this award. It reads: ‘To Katie McGrath, for courage, bravery, and sacrifice in the line of fire.’” He handed it to Katie, who was visibly overwhelmed as she clutched it to her.
“Are you okay to say a few words?” he whispered. She nodded, then moved to the microphone and took a deep, shaky breath. “Thank you. This is unexpected, and such an honor. But it feels strange to accept an award for doing the same thing every other teacher here was doing that day. We were all putting ourselves between your children and the danger they were in. Every year, your children, who you entrust to our care, become ours for a little while each day. We work hard to make sure they are learning what matters.
“Some days we want to wring their necks. Some days we are so proud of them for how hard they try. And every day we love them. Enough to die for them, which is what happened here. I don’t know why I’m still here, but all I can assume is that I am supposed to be. Again, thank you for this recognition, and thank you for the hundreds of letters and well-wishes that were sent to me.”
The audience gave her a standing ovation as she walked back to her chair, wiping tears as she went. The principal ended the program with a final announcement. “Earlier this morning, we unveiled five wooden benches on the playground. Each bench has a name etched on it to commemorate a precious life that was lost here. Yes, the names will be reminders of our tragedy, but as time passes, the benches will also come to represent a place to rest from the innocence of play, and for teachers to sit while they watch over your children on the playgrounds.
We will not forget.
“Now, this concludes our program. Students, unless your parents are here, you will return to your classes. Parents, if you wish to take your children home with you at this time, they will be excused. Just notify their teachers before you leave with them. And…Katie, I think your class is going back to their room with their parents and teacher in hope that you will stop by to visit with them before you leave...”
~~~
Katie McGrath, the teacher and main character, was looking forward to being married in her near future. One of the important reasons she was so happy was that she was, in addition to gaining a husband, she was also gaining a family... Katie had been a foster kid and by 12 realized that there were few, if any, people who really cared about her...Her attitude started to reflect what was surely a defense mechanism against being hurt...again...
Labels: Emotionally Damaged, Empathic Drama, God Incident, PTSD, romantic suspense, School Mass Shooting, Sharon Sala, The Next Best Day
Labels: 2022, Musical Thanksgiving
Each morning as I awake, I start thinking about writing about the wonderful books I've been reading, only to turn on the News and Learn of Still Anothr Mass Shooting!
Have you noticed that many television stations are pulling out specific past programs to highlight what is now happening in America... All over America, there are people striving to stop what has and is happening to America... Many writers are also using topics that are on the nightly news in one way or another, again, normally to show the "good over evil" theme... For surely, there is indeed a fight between good and evil... and right now, evil is winning... In my opinion, because they are allowed to, for whatever reason... And, it appears that, also my opinion, most of this incitement is coming from the republican party...
Take for instance, the Law and Order program last night. (The third video aboves highlights the theme.) Freedom of Speech Versus Use of Speech to Incite Hate and Violence. Let me just say that the man who incited hate and violence in white boys, was found guilty!!!
Yet republicans continues to incite... Mike Pompeo chose to name One Woman the most dangerous person in the world... Is this garbage dissemination for real?
Former Secretary of State Mike Pompeo speaks during a Republican Jewish Coalition Annual Leadership Meeting in Las Vegas on November 18, 2022.
Weingarten pushed back hard on Twitter. “I know that Mike Pompeo is running for president, and frankly, I don’t know whether to characterize his characterization ... as ridiculous or dangerous,” she wrote.
Weingarten accused Pompeo of defending “the Middle East’s tyrants,” “undermining Ukraine,” and kowtowing to Trump instead of “fighting 4 freedom.”
“So Mike, let me make it easy for you,” Weingarten continued in her Twitter thread. “We fight for freedom, democracy, and an economy that works for all. We fight for what kids & communities need. Strong public schools that are safe and welcoming, where kids learn how to think & work with others. That’s the American Dream!” (Click to read the rest of the news story...
Of course, all those running for office, or those who are now in congress or will be coming on board in January...are telling lies and spreading and inciting disinformation...
It is quite easy, therefore, to immediately tie all of the recent mass shootings to the republican party as well. Why? Well, we all know that answer don't we? But, just to clarify...I'm sharing what happens when the republicans refuse to stop assault guns used to murder in large numbers
Mass Murder at Walmart last night
Mass Murder at Community social club November 21
Mass Murder on college campuses days ago...
And it's extremely hard for me, especially, to see that supposed Christians have supported all of this such as January 6th!
I have NO choice. I must believe those who seek to eliminate the hate, the violence... Can we justify to ourselves, our God, doing something differently?
Bottom Line for me, though is this: Where were the Christians' outrage when ball games began to be played on our supposed Sabbath, and so many watch or play and even left church early (where I attended) to get to games!
Or consider that Christians have made no public concern about the fact that TV and Movie, and Game stars pull in more of an audience than do church leaders...
Or consider that many Christians have allowed and made Santa Claus and the Bunny Rabbit more important on two of the most important Christian celebrations...allowing their children to see just how much parents supposedly follow Christ our Savior...
Or consider that sexual abuse, human trafficking of children and teens, especially, and drugs are part of many lives of those who claim to be Christians... No wonder young people are having more and more problems with mental issues, given the hypocrisy seen... while their parents scream and even kill for changing laws on abortion, while supporting political leaders who "approve" of incest, rape, and lack of medical care for women... How could we possibly expect Americans to believe that we should be a "Christian" nation?!
God Bless
Gabbie
Labels: A Single Christian Woman, abortion, child mental and physical abuse, Emotionally Damaged, Evangelical Christians, Freedom of Speech, Incitement of Lies and Violence, republican party
SOMETHING happened to me in early life. I remember a boy looking up my dress, trying to see up my dress, telling me to stand this way or that way. I knew what he was doing. Was it part of playing?
SOMETHING happened to me in first grade. Dale Clark gave me a note: I like you, do you like me? I smiled at him--my first boy friend... Nothing happened... It was nice to have a friend who liked me.
SOMETHING happened to me in grade school. The girls got together to plan to wear shorts under our dresses...and swing on the limbs down in the woods... Boys watched...
SOMETHING happened during grade school... My Mom was working and my aunt and uncle started caring for me. I remember my uncle who called me Shorty, would tell me to clean up this plate or another. Maybe he thought he was helping since my mother worked so hard to feed us... I started to gain weight...
SOMETHING happened when my aunt and uncle moved into a larger house, maybe when I was around 5 or 6. My uncle wanted to know if I wanted to see his new barn. I remember he took my hand as we walked out the driveway. We looked around downstairs and then he took me to the second floor. Nothing was there except one chair and he said I could sit there. He bent down in front of me, and put his hands on both of my legs. He never did anything else that day. But I never went back out with him to the barn. When I told many years later, one sister started to talk about his neighbor women who were, supposedly, lesbians; the other sister declared I misunderstood... Mom was not a talkative woman on any subject; she was always working...
SOMETHING happened around fourth grade. A neighbor, Kenny, gave me my first kitten... He would sit up in the lawn of his uncle's home and wave to me on my porch--things like that... a nice "third" boy friend in my life... (Jimmy was a neighbor's grandson and we later went to school together, he was second for me to enjoy as a boy friend.)
SOMETHING happened to end that friendship. He was allowed to date and I knew I would not be...
SOMETHING happened in my teens, a cousin who carried newspapers came into the house, I was ironing. Before I realized what was happening he was saying, as he rubbed up closely against my back, "I think I'll take a break..." I stopped ironing and went to another room until he left. He was the son of that first uncle I talked about first above.
SOMETHING happened when I was visiting my grandmother. I can remember my grandfather but he died before I really got to know him. That day, an uncle was there with his children and we were all around the front porch. Dale called, "Hey Fatty"...and then asked a question, never heard because I had turned away. I remember my mother said, "Dale, your Uncle spoke to you..." I was irritated and turned to look at Mom and said, "That is not my name!" And walked away... No followup of what I did happened.
SOMETHING happened later that day, across the road. A grange building was located there and all the kids were in back of the and somebody decided to play like we were on a stage... I remember Joyce and I were at the top of the steps and moving around, lifting our skirts... I thought my sister Dee was there; she doesn't remember...
SOMETHING happened when I started Junior High. I became friends with two girls on the bus we rode to Masontown, PA. Carolyn was Catholic; Marian was the first Black person I had ever met. We became close friends. Carolyn had a boyfriend, Clyde who had a friend named Robert. I quickly developed a crush on him... We all were a group of friends... My weight remained high... I had many boy and girl friends during junor and senior high but no boyfriends. I had learned that being overweight made you..." different..." I never dated in highschool.
SOMETHING happened when I started to work in July, 1963. I had taken the standard employment tests and was offered a job in Personnel! Apparently my weight did not affect my test scores... (which I later looked up, of course! LOL)
SOMETHING happened when I started to become friends with the Director's secretary, Bettie. We became friends and she scheduled an appointment at the Student Clinic on campus... She and I were going to help me lose weight. Which I did...
SOMETHING happened as I started working and also losing weight... I began to get attention... At one time, I remember I counted that 13 men, all married, were flirting with me whenever they saw me or would even call me. knowing I answered the phone...
SOMETHING happened to me. I became aware that I must be attractive... For the first time, I saw myself as a woman "interesting" to men...
SOMETHING happened as I was answering all calls coming into the office at that time...A man said, "Will you Jack me off? "I'm sorry sir, I don't understand you, this is Personnel"... "Will you jack me off? I repeated my question. I could understand his words but didn't know what he meant. By that time, one of the employment officers had walked into my office and was listening. The guy asked again and I responded again. Finally he hung up in frustration, I guess. It happened to be that the guy in my office was called Jack. He asked me what was said and I told him. Jack started laughing, so much that he turned and left, saying I'll talk to you later. Jack and I were about the same age, but he quickly realized that I really didn't know what the guy was saying... When I later went to his office, Jack started laughing again, which bothered me, and he handed me a piece of paper. It held a word that I did not know and he told me to look it up..."
SOMETHING was very wrong. My life had been full of what you would call, perhaps, sexual abuse... (these are just the highlights of early years) And I realized when I read the meaning of the word that I was given to look up, that I was really not prepared to work in this world... And I realized something else... Everything that had happened in my life I had judged as The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly, based upon WHO the person was... Even if what was happening probably was bad for a Christian (I was baptized at age 13), but that because I loved the person, I considered it good--playing, touching, caring...
SOMETHING happened to me and I had learned that Sex was ALWAYS going to be part of it all... It seemed that Sex was THAT important in the world, and starting with my small community and church in which I grew up...
SOMETHING happened when the METOO Movement Started. I, for the first time in my life, openly stated that I was a victim! Just like so many other women and some men...
SOMETHING happened at that time. I realized that none of my family or the church had prepared me for what had happened or even seemed to care...
SOMETHING happened when a candidate for our president, was heard to say that he could grab "me," or any woman, and they wouldn't mind because he was famous... Me and thousands spoke out telling him he was wrong!
SOMETHING HAPPENED - I SAID "NO WAY COULD HE GRAB ME AND NO WAY SHOULD HE BE PRESIDENT!"
Labels: A Single Christian Women: Is Sex That Important?!, Child sexual abuse, MeToo Movement, Open Memoir, preface, sexual attraction, Sexual harassment
Labels: A Single Christian Woman, God So Loved the World, John 3:16, Open Memoir
Hi Everybody, I'm feeling great this morning, and out of the cycle of PTSD... If you made it through yesterday's post--Thank you those who allowed me to vent, and especially, to Anonymous with her one word comment, which was all I needed--Wonderful! If you made it, let's move on to what I've decided about my second book. A Single Christian Woman: Is Sex So Important?!
One thing I have learned by the later years of my life, is that nobody can separate their lives into "parts." You all know what I mean, if just one part becomes an issue--for example, dealing with a major construction project on your home--all parts of YOU are affected--mentally, physically, emotionally... We ARE What We ARE...
I happen to like me...In a recent conversation with Rachel, my great-niece and now caregiver when I need help, also decided she liked herself as she was too...
Along the way, we'll be talking about that more...!!! It's important! If God loves me and if you believe He created us with a plan...which I "kinda" do (more on that later), then, in my humble opinion, I think we should also like, and even love ourselves!
So, here's the plan... I will be writing both books at the same time, based upon, mostly, events of today that affects my daily living. And leads to flashbacks of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly of my life...
I will identify each book via Hashtag: which is a process used in computereze to, essentially, file a document within the computer...so that you can then find and assemble information on one topic.
The book(s) will be divided into Early Life, School Daze (spelling intended), Adult Life, and Memory Times.
I will be identifying each part of my life with a song that for me represents my personal life during that period.
As usual, music will accompany most anything I write, if at all possible. Most will be favorites of the time period; but in the retirement period, I'll be seeking out new songs in the religious area. You might have noticed that, for instance, on election day, when I wrote it...I wanted to represent America...so I used songs from various denominations, also Jewish, Muslim...I'm not sure if there were others...
One of the things I can alert all of you to is that, as you get older, plan ahead to deal with a natural occurrence--forgetfulness... we can talk about that later... But, my important first message: Forgetting does not mean that you are incompetent! You know, folks, it really irritates me when those who lie and think nothing of denigrating another with personal attacks on mental acuity, age or disability of an individual! It's happening far too often within the MAGA group, so you can bet I will be calling it out from time to time.
Labels: A Single Christian Woman: Is Sex So Important?!, Adult Living, Early Life, Emotionally Damaged, Life Stages, Living With Jod Burnout, Open Memoir, PTSD, Retirement, School Daze
I've learned enough to know that when your brain is stressed to the point that you are unable to function, and if that happens from your working environment, then you should consider that you are beginning or already into Job Burnout. It is not my intent to go into any part of the actual physical ramifications to your body--rather to just share what happened to me. One point though, I do want to mention, is that when you move into either clinical depression, which is what I was originally medically classified under, there is a permanent change to the chemical balance of your brain. For me, that imbalance has remained and results in flashback stressful activities from my past. And outward emotional reactions will be either to cry or become angry. If continued, it will become both.
The feelings of frustration, helplessness, aggression become so overwhelming that, sometimes, I am unable to do anything more than just...react! And, sometimes, perhaps, for the object of my emotions, over-react. But I have little or no ability to curb those emotions at the time... I have been Emotionally Damaged by Job Burnout. And Left With PTSD.
I'll be sharing most of this book through the use of what is commonly used in fiction, which I have found, after reading hundreds and thousands of books in my life, to be an effective way for me to create my story. At first, I had thought I would try to give a formal non-fiction format a try, but stewing over it overnight, I just didn't think it would work. Reading a story by Carolyn Arnold, one of my favorite writers, give me the clue that I needed...
Events in my present life, which have thrown me into PTSD, will be presented, thereafter, I will be sharing about the types of work experiences that have filled my life and which, in turn, led to, ultimately, Job Burnout.
I needed a new roof... Again...
Interestingly, as I look back, I don't recalI that I'd had any real problems with my roof; however, when my sister had to have a roof replaced of the house in which we both grew up, she had received a recommendation from my niece's husband, who lived across the street from my sister... Yeah, a "fly-by-night" type of company, for which I never knew a company name.
Looking back on it, I figure that this company did a good job because it was a different type of roof (higher) and that my niece's husband was probably watching them work...
My sister was happy and quickly recommended them to me, so I, of course, decided that it might as well get done now because I knew my roof was the original one when my cabin was built...
So, the crew came out and looked at my cabin's roof. I spent some time talking about specifics that I would also like done during the project. The leader shook his head, nodding "yes" and went on into that he could do it right away...if...
I had the money...
My little cabin is about 1400 square feet, with a split level roof, due to vaulted ceilings on one side of the building and a flatter level on the other side.
I choose not to include the details of that fiasco, except to share that I finally had gone into PTSD, exploded and fired the crew. They had completed the roofing, had done none of what I had asked for, and, we found, had used different shingles, which appeared to be old one. They had also damaged the roof when they replaced the satellite dish for my television. Note that I had told them that I would call the company at the appropriate time to relocate. They "assured" me that they had done hundreds of moving and relocating them into the exact same spot.
As an aside, over the last, say, 25 years, I have lost a very important thing in life... Trust... I'll be talking about it later in more detail. Let me just say that, after that, I had little trust...
After having done attempts to repair what damage was left by the first crew, the satellite finally had come through underneath and I was getting water damage to the wall and ceiling in my bedroom. I knew I had to act.
It was suggested that I look at a tin/metal roof. I had no preference at that time, but since the suggestion came from my niece, who will inherit the cabin, I started looking.
My caretaker brought a slick brochure picked up at the local county fair...It looked good; I contacted them. No response. I called Lowe's; they were efficient in the contact, but only did shingles...
I had put in a general online search for metal roofers. Several contacted me. I scheduled an onsite review with the first. Two other individuals were there for the first meeting. Their primary jobs were for shingle. The company could not deal with metal until at least March because they only had two crews for metal; however, he said he would do an estimate for both types and send to me via email. I never got it.
Glenda,
Congratulations, you’ve been pre-qualified for credit for your project with Home Genius Exteriors - Pittsburgh. *
Below is a link to your account on the EmpowerPortal where you can:
- Upload required documents securely
- Track the progress of your financing application
- Download an executed version of your Loan Agreement which includes a notice regarding our credit decision
- Submit bank account information to setup automatic payments
- Your account username: Gabixler@aol.com
- Your password: The password you created during registration. (If this is your first time accessing your account, you will be prompted to create a new password).
Should you have any questions about your financing application, please call Dividend Finance at (844) 572-7218.
If you have questions regarding the installation process, please contact your contractor.We look forward to working with you!
Sincerely,
The Dividend Team
* As with any financing, final approval is contingent upon our review of your completed application and satisfaction of all underwriting requirements.
Labels: Accountability, communicate, Corporate Integrity, Emotionally Damaged, Living with Job Burnout, Open Memoir, planning, PTSD, Staff development, supervision