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If you feel like letting go (hold on) If you think you’ve had too much Of this life, well hang on —“Everybody Hurts,” R.E.M.
I finished this 3-Part devastating Memoir last night! I was unsure how to proceed and finally decided that I would strongly recommend you read this book, if you care about young and older women's treatment in today's world. Over and over, I was appalled as how Jenna was treated by tabloid news representatives, by those who had actually abused her, as they tried to lie their way out of her accusations... But most of all, as I am prone to do, I connected two major paragraphs in the book...
I felt rage. How entitled and selfish do you have to be to continue hounding and threatening the very victims you’ve hurt before? It drove me crazy to think these people could potentially get away with silencing me for good. When someone on Twitter speculated that the FBI might kill me “to protect the ultrarich and well connected,” I felt the need to respond. If I died suddenly, I tweeted, no one should believe that it was an accident. “I am making it publicly known that in no way, shape, or form am I suicidal,” I typed hastily but resolutely (making several spelling and grammatical errors that I’ve corrected here). “I have made this known to my therapist and GP—If something happens to me—for the sake of my family, do not let this go away and help me to protect them. Too many evil people want to see me quieted.”
~
Donald Trump was now president, and in early 2017 he nominated Alexander Acosta—the former federal prosecutor based in Miami who had approved Epstein’s shameful, secretive nonprosecution agreement—to be secretary of labor. Acosta was confirmed in April 2017.
~
“I don’t want to talk to you,” the woman said. “Jeffrey’s dead, and you helped kill him.” That pissed me off. “I’m not here about what Jeffrey’s done,” I said. “I’m here about what you’ve done.” “I’m calling security,” she said, and soon, we were being escorted off the property.
~
“Ghislaine, twenty-two years ago, in the summer of 2000 you spotted me at the Mar-a-Lago Hotel in Florida and you made a choice. You chose to follow me and procure me for Jeffrey Epstein. Just hours later, you and he abused me together for the first time. “Together, you damaged me physically, mentally, sexually and emotionally. Together, you did unspeakable things that still have a corrosive impact on me to this day. I want to be clear about one thing: without question, Jeffrey Epstein was a terrible pedophile. But I never would have met Jeffrey Epstein if not for you. For me, and for so many others, you opened the door to hell. And then, Ghislaine, like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, you used your femininity to betray us, and you led us all through it.”
The above was written when she was told she could not participate in Maxwell's trial, because it would be "too disruptive..." (Everybody knew her name...) This statement was instead read at the trial as other victims testified...
~
There are other men whom I was trafficked to who have threatened me in another way: by asserting that they will use litigation to bankrupt me. One of those men’s names has come up repeatedly in various court filings, and in response, he has told my lawyers that if I talk about him publicly, he will employ his vast resources to keep me in court for the rest of my life. While I have named him in sworn depositions and identified him to the FBI, I fear that if I do so again here, my family will bear the emotional and financial brunt of that decision. I have the same fears about another man whom I was forced to have sex with many times—a man whom I also saw having sexual contact with Epstein himself. I would love to identify him here. But this man is very wealthy and very powerful, and I fear that he, too, might engage me in expensive, life-ruining litigation. I do not make this decision to hold back lightly. Part of me wants to shout from the highest rooftop the names of every man who ever used me for sex. Some readers will question my reluctance to name many of my abusers. If I am, indeed, a fighter for justice, why have I not called them out? My answer is simple: Because while I have been a daughter, a prisoner, a survivor, and a warrior, my most important role is that of a mother. First and foremost, I am a parent, and I won’t put my family at risk if I can help it. Maybe in the future I will be ready to talk about these men. But not now.
~~~
As I read, the book moves forward as she tells her story... But the faltering begins, when she begins to learn that those with whom she shared, would backstab her later, often coming back for more "dirt" than she was willing to give or to insinuate that she was not telling the whole story--that she was getting rich and famous...et.al., I recognized a brave woman that was willing to stand up and be brave... she shares of interaction online and about her desire and action to help not only those who were abused by Epstein, but the many others--she includes many recent events that have occurred after the Me-Too movement began and how it moved across the country like a fire of those who had been abused in some way... I joined that group...
At one point I was also going to write a memoir, with the title, A Single Christian Woman: Is Sex All That? As you know, I quickly abandoned that once I started paying attention to the news in 2015 and saw just how even a president can treat women who got in his way, or even just didn't support him... Since then I've read many fictional and nonfiction books describing what can and has been done to women... And when I read the story of Tamar, the daughter of King David during early times, I learned...and began to wonder... have we not learned anything since the death of Jesus for us?
Instead, not only rape, but ongoing abuse, trafficking for sex, and so much more is done to today's girls and women... A major book became available years ago about the grooming of our teenagers... Nothing significant has occurred. Indeed during the last decade we learned over and over about the rich and famous using out children for sexual favors... And, today, the leader of the House has sent everybody home, rather than having to deal with a request to release the huge volume of documentation that was accumulated on the Epstein case... Simply because Trump and Epstein were friends for ten years...
So, let's take a final look at the reality of the massive misogyny that began in the "BC" years--the days of harems, of the theft of daughters from citizens to become a member of the King's courts... Until today.
Of course, there were times of women speaking out to gain the right to vote, to gain equal pay for equal work... Little things like that... Sarcasm intended...
But, still, when it comes to sexual abuse, the ratio of women to men has always been extremely different. Why is that? Why is it when one young girl out of hundreds, possibly thousands of teenagers is chosen, escaped, finally found love, that she is hounded not only by those who had abused her, but those who are afraid of her desire to help solve this major problem?
Could it be that the young boys were never taught to actually respect women--their mothers, their sisters, and later their children? Perhaps because they read that King David did nothing when one of his children was raped, and another, a brother, committed murder in retribution... We began to question what our lives would have been like in biblical times...
Or is it just those who chose power over others, in whatever form, in order to achieve their own personal goals of greed which their power had permitted?
Jenna, yes, did write of her time when she thought it would be better for her family if she was gone... She did try suicide... But remember, by that time, there were trucks driving up to their home, sitting in a menacing manner... There were break-ins as well... There were trolls on social media who blamed her or thought she did it for the money, the glamor of her abuser's attention... Get real. No young virgin has ever thought about selling her body for the honor of being abused night after night, of being trafficked to men who were not even named--all they did was rape her... And sometimes even physically attack her bodily...
What I know is that, after reading her book and what I might have written about my own abuse, it was minor in comparison of what this young woman went through... Yet, she tried throughout her life, to forgive those family members who participated in her early abuse that was even before her teen years...
I have to ask about Jenna... Did she die just as we all believe that Epstein died? Was she murdered? She goes from claiming early that she would not ever commit suicide due to her experiences... Yet, by the end of her book, she had changed it to admit that there were a number of powerful people so influential that she was afraid to even reveal their names... What happened between the first firm statement of her not being the type to commit suicide... To, by the interaction with news reporters, lawyers representing her as the victim, against the lawyers of those powerful men who she knew were so powerful that she became more afraid for her husband and three children, than for herself... Will these possibilities ever be considered further, I doubt it...
Right now, the victims, which included Jenna have come together as a sisterhood, working individually and in a group to ensure that what Epstein and Maxwell did to them would be made public... And, right now, the Speaker of the House has sent the members of Congress home for months...for fear that the ultimate ability to vote on the release of the Epstein files, when a new member is sworn in, which he has delayed purposely, and required to proceed with the vote...
We all know that there is only one man who wants the files to never be released... The man who controls the Speaker and everybody else he brought with him...
I really wish I could understand how so many of those who were Christians suddenly bowed down to a man who is now tearing the nation and much of the world apart... What I do know is that Jenna was a woman who I admire, who felt strongly about helping others who had gone through the years of turmoil she had experienced in her life...
And why powerful men choose to believe that they have the right to do anything they want with the bodies of females... There is no mention of God being a part of her life, before she met Robbie... She began to learn about life--love--when she was 19...
Experts say that children learn by the age of four what they will learn from their parents...
Except if the love learned becomes a nightmare of pain and confusion... That child has also learned...
I was thrilled that Jenna did finally learn about love... And when she had a daughter, especially, that she was even more convinced that she had to work to change this world... I pray that her death will not be in vain...
GABixlerReviews
If you’ve read this far, I hope my story has moved you—to seek ways to free yourself from a bad situation, say, to stand up for someone else in need, or to simply reframe how you judge victims of sexual abuse. Each one of us can make positive change. I truly believe that. I hope for a world in which predators are punished, not protected; victims are treated with compassion, not shamed; and powerful people face the same consequences as anyone else. I yearn, too, for a world in which perpetrators face more shame than their victims do and where anyone who’s been trafficked can confront their abusers when they are ready, no matter how much time has passed. We don’t live in this world yet—I mean, seriously: Where are those videotapes the FBI confiscated from Epstein’s houses? And why haven’t they led to the prosecution of any more abusers?—but I believe we could someday. Imagining it is the first step. In my mind, I hold a picture of a girl reaching out for help and easily finding it. I picture a woman, too, who—having come to terms with her childhood pain—feels that it’s within her power to take action against those who hurt her. If this book moves us even an inch closer to a reality like that—if it helps just one person—I will have achieved my goal.
Cataclysm... “What the hell just happened to Greenland, Nicholas?” a voice crackled over the speaker. “It is shifting dramatically to the southeast. The rate of change in its position is astonishing.” “Jesus, the Yellowstone Caldera just blew,” stammered a small, balding man as he stared at a large screen directly in front of him. “What?” “The whole Pacific Northwest is going to be impacted.” “Impacted? That’s putting it mildly, isn’t it?” “Yes. Impacted…as if it had been hit by a meteor. The devastation is going to be off the charts. There was no time to evacuate...”
The Tower of Babel... “Okay, what really happened at the Tower of Babel, with the confusion of languages, and all that? Are you telling us that really happened?” Barry asked. “I only saw the tower from a distance, and I did not join any of the groups that formed after the confusion of the languages. That is another part of my curse, I suppose. God will not allow me to live in fellowship with anyone for very long. Over the centuries, I have, of course, learned many languages, but I was excluded from the partitioning of humanity into linguistic communities. Everyone else, however, found themselves speaking in tongues that they had not previously known, and in which they had not previously spoken. Many spoken languages simply ceased to exist on that day. I seem to have maintained the language that I spoke with my mother, father, and brother, but that language has disappeared from the face of the Earth, apart from myself, as far as I can tell,” Cain said somewhat sadly. “Can you still speak it,” Barry asked. “Sure, but you would not be able to understand it,” Cain replied. “We just want to hear what it sounded like,” Mike sneered. “As you wish, brother,” Cain said.
He then launched into a lengthy utterance that sounded like a cross between birdsong, the howling of wolves, and a cacophony of other sounds of the animals of the forest. Mike and Barry stared at each other in amazement. Cain “spoke” for a long time, and then lowered his head and looked again at his hands folded on the table. “What did you just say,” Barry asked excitedly. “It was a morning prayer of gratitude to our Creator,” Cain replied. “Much of it is not translatable into any current human language, but look out that window,” and he pointed to his left. The tree that was visible through the window had become full of what seemed to be hundreds of birds. All of them were looking in the same direction. They were all staring at Cain through that window. Suddenly, they all seemed to burst into chirping and singing, as if they had become excited. Just as suddenly, they all departed in unison. Mike and Barry looked from each other to the tree, to Cain, and back to each other again. “I haven’t seen anywhere near that many birds in one place since everything went to hell, Mike,” Barry said with wonder in his voice. Mike waved away his comment dismissively. “Can you tell us what any of it meant in English, Pope?” Mike asked. “Part of it says, roughly, ‘To you, Lord, we freely submit, and we gratefully embrace this life you have offered us,’ or words to that effect,” Cain said raising his eyes to the ceiling. “Most of the rest of it is praise in the voices of the animals that surrounded us in those days. All of the natural world declares the majesty of the Lord in one way or another.
People today cannot understand most of these declarations. That is sad, I suppose. In the early days, we always knew when we were speaking to God. We were just aware of God receiving our prayers and our expressions of gratitude. We felt it, for lack of a better expression,” Cain said bowing his head again. “I have not felt that in many, many years.” “Can you still understand the animals now,” Barry asked. “No,” Cain said without looking up. “No, I hear them in much the same way that the two of you hear them. God’s curse does not allow me even to commune with the natural world in the way that I once did. My banishment to the land of isolation and wandering is quite thorough. Even at this moment, I am not experiencing this very conversation in the way that you are, my brothers,” he stated with a shrug. “It is difficult to explain, but I am, at all times, beset with the understanding that I will probably never see either of you again after I leave this place. Thus has it been with me for all these centuries. I always return to wandering alone.” The three of them were silent for some time. “By the way, a man of Brian’s tribe, one of the camps of the ‘outsiders,’ as you call them, struck me with the back of his hand. Immediately after he hit me, I looked into his eyes and saw that he was terrified. To strike Cain is to summon the Angel of Death to one’s own door,” Cain said pointedly. “I assure you that man if he is not dead already, will be dead very soon. His death, I am confident, shall be indistinguishable from any other man’s death. It will appear to everyone else that he died of disease, or injury, or some other natural cause; but that man actually died, or will die soon, because he struck Cain. I have seen that same terrified look in the eyes of many men and women who have attacked me over the centuries. They immediately feel death rushing at them, welling up inside of them. I tell you this for your own benefit. You cannot kill Cain, but you can strike him. Thus far, nobody has ever struck Cain twice. The first blow fills my assailant with paralyzing fear. So, my brothers, I beseech you, please do not lose your temper and strike me. You will not survive long after doing so. Although I will not kill you myself, there is nothing I can do to forestall the consequences. Even if I forgive you immediately, your fate is sealed nonetheless,” and he waved one finger as a warning. Mike and Barry looked at each other with wide eyes. “Do you really expect us to believe that?” Mike finally asked. “Brother,”
Cain replied, “I do not expect you to believe anything I have told you – at least, not yet. Please do not try to test this claim for yourselves, though,” and Cain pretended to strike himself with his right hand, balled up into a fist. “I would prefer not to watch either of you die. For my part, I have seen far, far too much of that kind of thing. Please do not die on my account, my brothers. More than enough people are dead because of me.”
“Well, I am not suggesting that there is anything wrong with the Bible,” Cain said reassuringly, “but I have experienced a lot of things that are not mentioned in the Bible, and there are a lot of events in the Bible for which I was not present, so I do not know much more about some of the events in your Bible than you do. On the other hand, I can tell you about some of my experiences that did not make it into that book.”
~~~
Author William Ferraiolo is proving to be a writer that is, perhaps, the most unique I've personally encountered... After reading thousands of books, I had thought no new writer could surprise me. I was wrong... You may recall that I declared The EthicalAssassin, perhaps, Ferraiolo's first fictional book... Almost immediately, I received info about his latest book, The Pope of Atlantis. Yes, I got it and read the first half the first evening... Needless to say, I was once again surprised... I can only conclude that William Ferraiolo is a writer that writes what he wants to write, regardless of genre, title, or shock value... This book was well written and written in a normal format... But, the Plot is simply extraordinary as well as mystifying... Is it Fantasy, Dystopian, Religious Fiction Historical, Adventure, Alternative History... there is NO WAY to fit this book, again, within the normal range of genres... Let's make it, simply, Multi-Genre... And then I realized that there just might be--yes--philosophical fiction is an established genre! And that's what makes it exceptional... Very, exceptional... Not to say that I'm "well-read" in the normal sense of the word, but, in fiction, I had never been even asked to read a book that was so clearly based upon a philosophical approach:
Philosophical fiction is a genre that builds its narratives on intellectual inquiry, using story and character development to explore fundamental questions about existence, morality, and human nature.
As I think about The Ethical Assassin, I don't think I would change anything I provided on that review; however, this latest book proves to me that this author is a new writer in fiction to watch closely!
For instance, the title of the book is created within the dialogue between two main characters. You know, "I'm Mike--What's your name buddy?"
But let's start at the beginning, shall we, because the World is in the midst of being destroyed...some countries are sliding into the oceans; some are simply being buried upside down, perhaps by an earthquake or something similar... The book begins with the news announcing what is happening--at least until there is no more news... We then discover that there are only two small areas in all the world that has some semblance of normalty--except for lack of food and all the things we would normally have immediate access to. As we learn more, it appears that about Eight Billion People are dead... (Now, I think it was very important, to me at least, that later in the book Cain talks about God "disappearing" people; that is, moved off the planet--I happen to believe there are more good people on earth or those who do not deserve to die, than the number saved at the time of the Great Flood where only Noah's family, and animals, were saved--personal opinion, of course, and not questioning God's decisions... well, maybe, sometime my mind wanders...LOL.
“I will tell you, my friend,” Cain said as if Mike had asked him a question, “over all the centuries, I have never ceased to marvel at the inclination among the people to delude themselves and to believe what they want to believe, no matter what the evidence suggests.” Mike looked at Cain until he raised his head to look Mike in the eye. “What makes you say that just now, Pope?” “Although I sense that you may be coming around to taking my story seriously, at least somewhat,” Cain replied, “you still cling to the belief that I simply cannot be Cain. I simply cannot be Adam’s son. You will not allow yourself to believe that you could not pull the trigger on that revolver,” and he motioned to the gun that was positioned across the room, “because God has made it impossible for any man to kill me. You have no viable alternative theory to explain what you experienced, but you resist the one theory I have presented, nonetheless. Whether you believe it or not, I will live until God allows me to die, but you may never come to accept the story I have told you about my curse. Is the idea that God is watching so frightening to you? Is scripture really more implausible than any other explanation you may have entertained?”
(in my lifetime, this issue has never been more of an issue than ever...At least millions are protesting, now seeing the lies and violence that smothers our lives daily...)
Now is the time to introduce our main character, whose name is... Cain... Yes, that one... And if some of you may not know the Biblical story, here's a short refresher...
My only point is that the two of you gentlemen,” and he paused to look from one man to the other, “know what men are capable of doing to one another. Yet you ask me what I know about the devil? I know mankind. That, it seems to me, is enough.”
Now recognize that Cain and Abel were two of the sons of Adam and Eve. In fact, the writer declares that he is positive the first creation chapters of the Old Testament were literally true. And that they were kicked out of the Garden of Eden after disobeying God.... And, God, as an all-knowing God, already knew that Cain had killed his brother and put a curse upon Cain to wander the earth until God saw that Cain had changed.
However, the author takes this opportunity to point out that Cain was indeed the first person to have committed murder on Earth. And then shares all that he did in defiance of God's curse, so that, more or less, those who murder or use violence in today's world are actually descendants of Cain... For me, and many of us who want to know why, this seems to be a simple logical reason to explain those we call the good and bad people... At least for purposes of considering a logical discussion...
So, where did the title of the book come from? Well, God had brought Cain to the only two places that still existed on earth. The first leader refused to even consider what they were told. Mike on the other hand happened to be where he was in Alaska because there was a military outpost he commanded there and when the world started disappearing, Mike had brought his troop and moved into the one community that survived, and took control. Because there were already cannibals living there... Yes. Truth... In any event, Mike and his second in command greeted their visitor and welcomed him--mainly because guns had not been able to be used to kill him. So Mike wanted to know more. But both of the military leaders refused to believe that Cain was still alive and wandering the earth since being born near the Garden of Eden from which Adam and Eve had been forced to leave... So, while refusing to accept Cain's real name, Mike threw out something like that he might as well claim that he was Pope of Atlantis... and then decided Pope would be Cain's name while they figured out who he really was...
In addition to the cannibals, which were surely people who were starving and turned to eating their neighbors when food was gone, there were also a group of Inuit indigenous people who had lived in the area as well. An elder of this group was involved in an exciting God Incident that took place as days went by. Days when they were working to figure out, and hopefully learn as much as they could from Cain, as to whether this was the end of Planet Earth... And while that occurred, readers will learn about the historical events to which God had directed Cain in order to observe what was happening to God's people... (See above re The Tower of Babel, for example...) All of these stories were fascinating...by the way... But, no matter what, time was moving on...
Cain indeed had changed and was trying to follow God's ways, but he was lonely and had not, for many years, been permittd to develop any type of relationship with humans. Until now... But nobody knew what that meant... And knowing that there was also a feeling of distrust by those surrounding him, did not really match his desire to again hear God's voice... Thousands of years had passed, Cain was still a young man, invincible, but totally controlled by the curse that he now knew he had deserved...
“I am on the path again,” he said much more quietly than he had spoken just a bit earlier. “There must be others. There must be something else coming. If God is willing, then I will do His bidding as long as He permits me to remain in His service.”
I can only tell you that I wish this book had not ended... So, I've done the next best thing... William Ferraiolo has agreed to participate in a discussion here on Book Readers Heaven to expand upon what was covered in the book, as soon as we can get it put together... So do watch for the announcement! This book is, in one way, heartbreaking, but also very inspirational. It is informative as the author's research has undoubtedly been used in the Bible, Qur'an and other religious and philosophy books to pull together this amazing story... But, do not think it is an ordinary story, a fantasy... unless you read it yourself... Personally, I found that the premise that Cain being th first murderer, and that he had many wives and children, was a logical basis upon which to discuss the "why?" of all the violence experienced on Earth... We may not like it but...it is worthy of explortion... Especially NOW when religion has been brought and used as a tool in the political chaos now happening... Highly recommended!
GABixlerReviews
In the early days, we always knew when we were speaking to God. We were just aware of God receiving our prayers and our expressions of gratitude. We felt it, for lack of a better expression,” Cain said bowing his head again. “I have not felt that in many, many years.”
Here is my theory as to why it’s difficult for many women to think of female leaders. I have made it into a poem:
Women did not create America’s political system.
Men did.
If women get a chance to invent a new way of governing—
which, of course, we will, and it will be infinitely superior—
we won’t have to rack our brains
envisioning
women leaders.
Because our leaders will be women.
What women can envision right now—
without the slightest hesitation—
is getting rid of men.
~~~
For instance, at the National Women’s Hall of Fame in Seneca Falls, New York, just to jump ahead in our story, Jennifer and Irene, who both work at the Hall of Fame, suggest that “the men” could be “put out on the golf course,” where they can “hit their balls.”
The National Women’s Hall of Fame, by the by, is hung with photos, bios, and plaques of famous women. “While I’m here,” I say, “I would like to nominate Melania Trump and put her up there on your wall of fame with Harriet Tubman, Louisa May Alcott, Susan B. Anthony, Maya Angelou, Lucille Ball, Margaret Bourke-White, and Julia Child.”
“Go ahead!” says Irene.
“If any woman deserves a plaque on your wall,” I say, “it’s Melanija Knavs Trump!”
“It’s a hundred dollars for the plaque,” says Irene, “which we will send to Mrs. Trump. Plus five dollars for the shipping and handling. And then we will display a copy of her plaque on the wall forever.”
I pay without trifling and send the plaque to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, Washington, D.C.
I want it engraved with the following, if possible: FOR IDIOCIES SUFFERED AS A RESULT OF BEING DONALD TRUMP’S FIRST LADY
I haven’t checked, but I believe the permanent copy of the plaque now resides on the wall of the National Women’s Hall of Fame. Congratulations, Melania!
"He wants you to answer, 'We're together because I can’t go on living without you, and because you are a god among men.' When you get bored of saying that, and if he can’t make an effort to hold a real conversation,you should respond, 'We’re not.' And accept his invitation to go." (May 2019 issue of ELLE)
On Navigating Male Attention Post #MeToo
"The only 100 percent guaranteed way to stop men from 'crossing the line' is using a tranquilizer gun. In the #MeToo era, each woman has to decide where her own line is and how firmly she will prevent each boss, preacher, teacher, coworker, old friend, and stranger from crossing it. She alone determines which reaction is 'right' for her. And by each of us choosing for ourselves, we empower all womankind." (September 2019 issue of ELLE)
!!!
When an Advice Columnist (longest running yet) reads all the letters that are sent, finds that most, or all of them, are from women and decides she needs to write a book, how does she go about doing it? I wondered... but then as I started thinking about how to talk about the book, I realized that it was quite simple... Or at least it seemed so, AFTER she had written it...
Then, I was fairly certain about her tone in asking the question, but I went out on Elle's online site and selected just two of those "Asks" that are available there... Yes, they were funny, perhaps a little sarcastic sometimes, but, then, straight to the point! I was smiling even before I started to write...
First, she knew she needed to do research, asking just one question. But where would we begin asking. Well, the author chose to go traveling to every town that had a woman's name as part of the location; for example, Marysville, Ohio... So she planned her itinerary based upon that one assumption... Got in her car, got everything ready to travel for herself and her traveling companion, Lewis Carroll... And she sets off!
Then when she gets there, she might put up her sign on the top of her car, "Free Advice" or she's stopped for a meal and start talking to the women, and sometimes men, who she meets! Cool, Right?! BTW, I've seen some critical comments from men who reviewed the book. I think this is definitely Chic Lit"; but if you're a man who, when his woman asks you to go talk to a woman with a kilt on and a dog with aquamarine hair, and you go...then you are probably the men who will be allowed to stay when we women take over...
Ironically, my caretaker who drives for me, takes me to the doctor, etc., and I had just been discussing that we both felt that women needed to take over businesses, for a start... I, for one, had already determined that men who are involved with service companies, such as Home Depot, or even KFC, have NO empathy (and few skills or ability to learn) with which they interact with their customers! Else we women wouldn't be ranting as much as we do...daily...
So I was prepared to sit back and enjoy the trip...
And, it began with a superb but quite descriptive Prologue for us:
Women! You are fabulous! But for twenty-five years, you have been writing to me at the Ask E. Jean column in Elle seeking advice, and for twenty-five years, no matter what problems are driving you crazy—your careers, your wardrobes, your love affairs, your religion, your children, your orgasms, your finances—there comes a line in almost every letter when the cause of your quagmires is revealed. And that cause is men.
Ladies, I have been thinking about this dilemma. It occurs to me that when men are not passing the Ask E. Jean correspondents over for promotion, they are pestering, groping, pawing, pinching, mauling, and underpaying the Ask E. Jean correspondents. But my concern is not confined to Ask E. Jean letter-writers only. The whole female sex seems to agree that men are becoming a nuisance with their lying, cheating, robbing, perjuring, assaulting, murdering, voting debauchers onto the Supreme Court, threatening one another with intercontinental ballistic nuclear warheads, and so on.
Now, I have weighed the two schemes put forth to solve this problem: arresting the chaps and/or impeaching them. Bah! These measures will accomplish nothing! My scheme does away with the lads entirely. I do, therefore, humbly offer for your consideration the following Modest Proposal: The average American man is five foot nine and weighs 195.5 pounds. I have been assured by female scientists that the male body is roughly composed of 0.00004 percent iodine, 0.00004 percent iron, 0.05 percent magnesium, 0.15 percent chlorine, 0.15 percent sodium, 0.25 percent sulfur, 0.35 percent potassium, 1 percent phosphorus, 1.5 percent calcium, 3.2 percent nitrogen, 10 percent hydrogen, 18 percent carbon, and 65 percent oxygen, and these elements would, on the open market, fetch around $1 per bloke. If we plump the lads up, we could be looking at $1.02 or $1.03! The number of males in America is generally reckoned at 164,628,232. Ladies, I propose that we dispose of our chaps at the $1.03 price and put their elements to better use. Not only would this solve all the problems of the Ask E. Jean correspondents, but since ninety-nine out of a hundred calamities throughout history have been caused by men, and since we will be eliminating a prodigious number of idiots, dickweeds, numbskulls, brutes, weaklings, and dingbats (and that’s just from the US Congress), the benefit to the nation would be infinite. Plus, with the $170 or $180 million we receive, we will be able to purchase, in return, eleven or twelve genuine Birkin bags. But before I feel completely satisfied with offering this plan for your consideration, Ladies, and to make absolutely certain that before we sell their elements on the open market, the chaps aren’t actually needed for anything, I will leave my little cabin in the woods and travel to towns named after women. And when I arrive in each town named after a woman, I will get out of the car and ask people, “What Do We Need Men For?”
The date is October 6, 2017. Prepare for immortality! The maps, the wine, the books, the clothes, the Baby Ruths, the Girl Scout cookies are packed. I have said farewell to the cat, Vagina T. Fireball. The dog, Lewis Carroll, has taken up his position in the back seat with his head out the window. I have donned my Korean driving cap, which, to look fashionable, must be worn pulled down over one eyebrow. To look fabulous, it must cover the entire eye, socket and all, plus half the other eye. It was designed by a woman who must have had a chauffeur. I have returned to the cabin to say farewell again, to the cat. Oh, and one more thing.
No one need be carried from the room. For instance, when we get to the section of the book about the president and how he throws me against a wall and yanks down my tights in Bergdorf’s—do not be alarmed, Ladies. As I write, he is still married to the First Lady. Anyway, I assure you that I have been attacked by far, far better men than the president. One of my husbands, the glamorous ABC anchorman, for instance, was a famous choker whom I wore for three seasons. Here we all are in a photo taken at a party. But, happily, not every man we meet will try to yank down my tights—though, in the very first chapter, there is a boy who knocks me to the ground and, well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves—it takes more than a bunch of dolts to stop your advice columnist!
So, Ladies, honk your horns! We’ve got a big, big road trip ahead of us! LET’S GO! P.S. Let me assure you that I have not the least personal interest in endeavoring to promote this Modest Proposal. I have no men by which I can get a single penny when we sell their elements—no current husbands, bosses, etc., etc.—even if the chaps turn out to fetch prices as high as $1.05 or $1.06! I have no other motive than the public good of the nation.
~~~
What I wasn't prepared for was the author's own "list" as part of her book--think personal tell-all memoir... And my tears of sorrow as I read... You see, the author and I are about the same age... We have both experienced sexual abuse as a young child... We are both members of the #MeToo Movement... And have survived quite well!
The Most Hideous Men in My Life...Carroll starts numbering these molestors or otherwise abusive actors as she goes... Personally, I found the break of this sharing about those men who had treated E. Jean horribly needed... The book goes back and forth between her trips and stops, until, perhaps, something sets the author back to a terrible time in her life, when a man was involved. Each time, there is a familiar ring to the words...
Heading to Elyria, Ohio. with Aretha blaring, the author stops at Oberlin College to meet up with some college girls! She puts out her sign, but this time she turns the tables on two students... I Need Advice! And another interview begins... She explains that none of the problems she's been receiving on Ask E. Jean are from men. One student quickly responds that is because all problems are caused by men... Good start, right?!
In fact, except for providing sperm for children, most of the responses were, honestly, that they could get along without men... Some even bragged that they could do anything better than men--this from a proud woman who worked a farm and had discovered that there weren't too many men willing to put in the work! Single, farming and doing fine!
Now this didn't surprise me, nor will it surprise readers, will it? Except reading this part of the book is indeed funny and, she finds one thing that men are good for--fixing cars because hers starts giving her problems and is forced to stay overnight... frustrated... But she finds women to talk to everywhere she goes!
If you can't answer the question, What Do We Need Men For?, I highly recommend you read the book... While it is definitely written to share and have fun between and among women, some men might also enjoy it, although my recommendation is to women! LOL
A few personal comments. The type of events when the author was very young should be read carefully. You might want to consider who your babysitters are after learning what happened--individually or in group settings...
I found the scene where the author was raped by our past president very credible... The interaction was casually flirty, at first... each identifying the other that they knew who they were... And then...the shock of violence mixed with sexual abuse. Given all that I'd heard, including the famous boast that he could grab women by the pussy was totally in line with what happened... Except that this woman didn't accept the grabbing... Nor did we want it...
The other thing I realized that I would be rethinking whether or not I will be writing my own memoir in relation to this aspect of my life. I can probably just say, Read E. Jean Carroll's book and you'll get the idea... Sexual Assault has been going on since Bible times... Sometimes I wonder if, because it is in the Bible, that men feel they have a right to rape a young girl... or any woman... I tried to tell myself No, that probably most men don't even read the Bible... But the thought still lingers...
This book deserves your attention... Read it to reinforce your own opinions or laugh if some story hits a little too close to home, even if you decide to keep the man in your life, rather than sell him... Or put him in one of the camps that will be another option... Or, read it together and be thankful that you are not the type of man that many women...can...do ...without...
A COMMENT ABOUT CENSORSHIP - By the Author - These are scary days in which to raise teenagers. I know. I’ve had four of them. Part of the problem is that we have a generation that has been exposed to unprecedented amounts of sexual behavior in the media and on the Internet. They see it, they talk about it, their hormones react, and a lot of kids wind up in painful situations.
Literature is the safe and traditional vehicle through which we learn about the world and pass on values from one generation to the next. Books save lives. Contemporary young adult literature surprises some people, because it is an accurate reflection of the way today’s teenagers talk, think, and behave. But these books must be honest in order to connect to the teen reader. America’s teens are desperate for responsible, trustworthy adults to create situations in which they can discuss the issues that are of the highest concern for them. Reading and discussing books is one of the most effective ways to get teens to think through and learn about the challenges of adolescence. Most of the censorship I see is fear-driven. I respect that. The world is a very scary place. It is a terrifying place in which to raise children, and in particular, teenagers. It is human nature to nurture and protect children as they grow into adulthood. But censoring books that deal with difficult, adolescent issues does not protect anybody. Quite the opposite. It leaves kids in darkness and makes them vulnerable. Censorship is the child of fear and the father of ignorance. Our children cannot afford to have the truth of the world withheld from them. They need us to be brave enough to give them great books so they can learn how to grow up into the men and women we want them to be.--Included in the book, Speak (along with discussion guide, sexual assault survivor kit resources.
U.S. Department of Justice, 44 percent of rape victims are under the age of 18 and 46 percent of those victims are between the ages of 12–15. It makes adults uncomfortable to acknowledge this, but our inability to speak clearly and openly about sexual issues endangers our children. It is immoral not to discuss this with them.
Whenever I get a chance, I watch Velshi's Banned Book Club, hosted on MSNBC. This morning it discussed The Lord of the Flies, but I was more interested and had bought the last book discussed which was Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson. The book was originally published in 2011, has sold over 2.5M copies, has received awards, made into a movie, and has now been featured in The Philadelphia Citizen. An interesting interview should be heard first, as the author laments that her book(s) continue to be viewed as worthy of being...banned...
As I've mentioned before, the right of choice, for me, is always immediately associated with rape/incest... Thus the actions of the Supreme Court, whose members are now controlled by the far-right republicans, as well as republican leaders all over the United States are quickly now being responded to by action by women and men all over the country, who are working to ensure these rights that were arbitrarily lost by, we all know, purely by political actions, are to be reinstated.
Statements like, "Don't Say Gay," are similar in intent to incite fear and/or anger, just as much as those who are presently running for congress who claim that they will force abortion to be banned across the nation. And, further, and most important, that they will make no exceptions! Not for the mother's life, not for rape...and not for incest! Even the elimination of birth control is being discussed...
I am a Christian; I do not condone abortion as a means of birth control, which many often claim is the "primary" way abortion is being used. However, I very much believe that child birth is known to be a dangerous situation, and I believe that the health care before, during, and after birth is a period during which many choices might need to be made, for valid, personal reasons. To return to a point where we no longer can feel secure in proper and effective medical care during pregnancies is totally unacceptable... and, to show a parallel of its importance. Consider the Afghan women who are now being forced to wear the full-body clothing, as well as having loss of loss of their rights to education! Forced upon them by tyrannical, domineering men!
It appears that Trump has ultimately incited...and indeed allowed misogyny to break free to those men who do not feel a need to have a "partner" in their relationships. Rather, they prefer to be the dominating individual in any relationship. This certainly is not based upon God's love, yet it is being puched down our throats by those republicans now in office who have started what is being considered a catastrophe by the majority of women...and many men... in our country.
CODE BREAKING
Hairwoman has been buying new earrings. One pair hangs all the way down to her shoulders. Another has bells in them like the pair Heather gave me at Christmas. I guess I can’t wear mine anymore. There should be a law.
It’s Nathaniel Hawthorne Month in English. Poor Nathaniel. Does he know what they’ve done to him? We are reading The Scarlet Letter one sentence at a time, tearing it up and chewing on its bones.
It’s all about SYMBOLISM, says Hairwoman. Every word chosen by Nathaniel, every comma, every paragraph break—these were all done on purpose. To get a decent grade in her class, we have to figure out what he was really trying to say. Why couldn’t he just say what he meant? Would they pin scarlet letters on his chest? B for blunt, S for straightforward? I can’t whine too much. Some of it is fun. It’s like a code, breaking into his head and finding the key to his secrets.
Like the whole guilt thing. Of course you know the minister feels guilty and Hester feels guilty, but Nathaniel wants us to know this is a big deal. If he kept repeating, “She felt guilty, she felt guilty, she felt guilty,” it would be a boring book and no one would buy it. So he planted SYMBOLS, like the weather, and the whole light and dark thing, to show us how poor Hester feels. I wonder if Hester tried to say no. She’s kind of quiet. We would get along. I can see us, living in the woods, her wearing that A, me with an S maybe, S for silent, for stupid, for scared. S for silly. For shame. So the code-breaking part was fun for the first lesson, but a little of it goes a long way.
Hairwoman is hammering it to death. Hairwoman: “The description of the house with bits of glass embedded in the walls—what does it mean?” Utter silence from the class. A fly left over from fall buzzes against the cold window. A locker slams in the hall. Hairwoman answers her own question. “Think of what that would look like, a wall with glass embedded in it. It would … reflect? Sparkle? Shine on sunny days maybe. Come on, people, I shouldn’t have to do this by myself. Glass in the wall. We use that on top of prison walls nowadays. Hawthorne is showing us that the house is a prison, or a dangerous place maybe. It is hurtful. Now, I asked you to find some examples of the use of color. Who can list a few pages where color is described?”
The fly buzzes a farewell buzz and dies.
~~~
Note from Gabby: If I had Hairwoman for a teacher,
I'd be saying the same as Melinda! Boooring...
Melinda is the main character of Speak. The book is written somewhat like a diary--as if, she writes there only when she has something important to say... Such as when her English teacher forces the entire class to explore, analyze, and discuss the selected book for this year,.. and determines that it should be read and digested...one sentence at a time... Can you even imagine this? No wonder Melinda had flashes of being a good student...and then, just ignoring the whole class topic scene...
Of course, after she was raped, at age 13, and didn't tell anybody, she had a lot to think about besides school, parents, and friends. Like, how she really hated the fact that she didn't scream and get him off of her... how she didn't know how to share this, after, when she came back to the beach party, crying, her best friend slapped her in the face for calling the cops... And, especially, just how did she think she could ever tell her parents, especially since they didn't know she had been at a party, drank enough beer to be considered drunk, and that, at first, thought it was cool that a senior thought her cute enough to ask her to go for a walk with him... And that, when he asked, she didn't realize what he was asking and by the time she did and started speaking, that he held his hand over her mouth and proceeded...
Melinda decided that, since she didn't immediately speak to the police and parents, that she just wouldn't say anything...And she began to not "speak" any more than she had to. Her parents at one point even took her to a doctor, with whom she wouldn't speak, of course. Little by little she began to return to her usual activities, most of the time being alone. She even had discovered a rarely used closet at school, where she smuggled in a blanket and had several books and pictures, one of Maya Angelou (which the librarian had to take down, because one of her books was being banned), and others which she was creating herself in the one class, Art, for which she had some personal connection. Fortunately the teacher was empathetic and chose to spend a little more time in clarifying what the meaning of art could mean to her personally.
But then, her supposed friend--the one that had slapped her on the night of her rape and had spoiled the party calling the cops, began to date the senior who had raped her... She felt she had to tell her, but could she?
Since Anderson has written the books, thousands of teens have contacted her sharing how much her book meant to her. She was gratified that it included boys, and so she wrote a book, Twisted, hoping she could have sufficient knowledge and empathy to have it respond to boys needs... Apparently it has... Yet many continue to call for a banning of her books!
I found myself reliving my early "me too" situations--ones that I've never shared. Thankfully, none led to rape, but, even so, they were of incestuous actions which were traumatic in a different way from that of a rape by a stranger, I think, but just as destructive of a young girl's ability to...trust...
If I had a daughter, I would make an effort to share with her. As the author clearly states, it is immoral not to...
Too bad, many men do not see anything wrong with rape, including incest... If they only knew--and took the time to learn about their potential girlfriends before they even think about having sex... One of the results would have been that a court case would never had been needed to determine that a girl/ woman always must have complete control of her own body.
Make sure you get the latest edition of this book, including the additional supporting materials... Get it for yourself...and then another copy for any young teen that you love and have enough concern about her future to initiate a discussion on this very important subject...
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