Paula Rose Michelson Presents Book 1 of The Crucible of Becoming, The Time Between (With "Sound Track"?!!!)

I am excited to tell you about an interesting series of short stories that have been uniquely formulated...first around various songs. Each chapter has a song as the title and provides an idea of what that chapter will provided... For instance, Chapter 1 introduces the main character and someone told her to go and find her smile...

Rock, paper, scissors, isn’t that how it goes? Sometimes we have to dig our way out…or is it dig our way in? I forget. Silence Maybe you’re not really there, but then you must be because I’m talking to you. Or am I thinking. Hahahaha…I sound crazy!! Crazy because…say, have you ever noticed that everyone’s recognized for something, and those noticing…well, they notice out of love. That is, unless you’re me. My stuff gets noticed because I’m…maybe that’s why I love food so much.

Not just any food, no siree! I love my grandpa’s baked goods, an’ it’s been workin’ for me ‘cause he owns a bakery and lives next door.  Oh, no! I remind myself as I begin to wake up. That’s not really true. They were just nice people who fed me and helped me pretend. But they weren’t mine! I hear my mom screaming for me to hurry and get dressed for school. Knowing if I’m late, I’m gonna…but I hear dad talkin’ and smile. It’s not gonna be a flyswatter day, ‘cause dad’s home. 

I jump out of bed and hurry to get to the kitchen on time. I don’t remember anything else. Nothin’ until I’m standing in someone else’s flower bed trying to snap their snapdragons and crying cause grandma…my make-believe grandma, told me ‘the scares’ would go away when I heard a snap. None snap for me.  Looking up, I see cars rounding the bend and realize I’d better hurry home before I catch hell again. 

Someone sees me and hollers, “Shirley, your mom’s lookin’ for you!”  Yah, that’s my name, Shirley, as in, “What happened to you? You were supposed to look like Shirley Temple! You got the right color hair and eyes but you’re just a…” 

Every time I hear that, I want to say, no, I was supposed to look the way God made me…and I do! Instead I hear mom sigh and then… Lalala, oh God, make it go away! I don’t want to hear THAT word again! And please don’t let her wallop me with that fly encrusted swatter! Mom doesn’t say it, at least, I think she didn’t, but all I hear is disappointment ringin’ over and over in my ears until I wish I were deaf. Oh God, why me? I must be stupid to be worried about that flyswatter while wishing and waiting for an answer from a God who dropped me into the uterus of a woman who… When all else seems to…I want to pray but…… Since no one in my home prays or talks about God, fat chance at Him listening to me. After all, what am I? Just one big mistake… That’s what!

~~~

Sometimes when life hits you hard and long and, seemingly, with no reason, it permanently affects you in some way. Crucible, a severe trial, out of which something new will come, presents in this first short story, our main character, Shirley was now an adult, a speech therapist, married, but, she never seemed to smile... You may think of this book as an "intervention." You see, Shirley had never faced what had happened to her when she was a child. Worse, she didn't understand why she had gone through what she had...

Now she was forced to...and she reacted immediately...she ran... But where could she go?

Where can you go when you are being confronted with your fear, your anger--all that has hurt throughout your life, even if it were buried from your daily life. What would it take for Shirley to take that first step?

This story is an emotional seesaw that takes readers to the depth of pain of not only one person, but another. The difference is that one of those individuals has found the love of God and his wondrous forgiveness. This discovery was not known by Shirley, but she saw and watched and listened as the other woman, once a friend, explained what had been denied Shirley all her life--the Truth!

The story itself is not heartwarming, yet the emotional response of what happened for the characters, will have an inspirational impact on readers who take the time...and understand...to see how bad things happen that, once the truth is revealed, can result in good, loving understanding...

This first story is continued in the next...I highly recommend you read this first to get the full impact of the second (I didn't, so I know)...Please read this story from the beginning!

“This is about you becoming your own best friend.”

“...You needed to grow where God planted you and learn the lessons that were there.”




It seemed to me that here, of all places, I was smiling a real heartfelt smile. I was neither angry nor sad that it happened this way, though I was mystified as to the details that brought me to this moment.

And now ‘El’ was sad, and though I couldn’t…didn’t know diddly, I thought it was something that had to do with me, though for the life of me, 

I had no idea what that could be.

I awoke, and it was another day. Feeling at sixes and sevens, as I always had when here, I suddenly knew Thomas Wolfe was wrong. I was once again home, once more a prisoner of ‘Heartbreak Hotel’, ‘cept I knew this wasn’t a hotel, ‘cause it had always been the ‘Pit of Hell’!

But how can I? Knowing that families have issues that each generation has to deal with, would my giving in make me a victim again…amend that to still...

Was I a fool to stay? I’d never know if I left, so very aware that the questions I’d never asked, and those I asked that were never answered, could be...


The woman I’d called ‘sweetie’, a short while ago…  
Oh God, do I really need to know?

This is a family story. In this case, it is about a mother and child...but it is also about her husband, who loved her, Shirley, enough to know that she was not completely happy... He was willing to risk, potentially, everything for her to find her place in this world...

“Okay now, Shirley.” She forced a chuckle, and much to my surprise, she joined me in this singsong song. At the end, we were both giggling...


It’s because of that… Say, do your kids ever watch the Magilla Gorilla Show?” “What’s that got to do with this?”
 “The Magilla is what I’m about to share.” 
Oh gosh, I found myself thinking, I’ve heard many need to regress but I’m not going to play this game mom, or no mom! “In the middle of my, I mean your, story, after all this time, you want to talk about a kids’ cartoon show?”




...my head still screaming at me, it’s all your fault. You’re a sinner and though saved by grace, I cannot forgive myself unless…



“Yes. And they wanted to have children.” “It sounds like none of you got what you…” “We would have, if only—” “If only what?”




...while some woman yelled, “Please God, don’t let them kill each other!” I don’t know what would’ve happened. As it was, Shirl turned away from me.
 “You’re all about God, so that’s gotta be for you!”



 “Both of you can get where you want to be if you remember the name, I mean title, of a song from an old Broadway. Umm, what was that tune called… Ah, that’s it! ‘It’s never too late to fall in love’.”



 I held you for the very last time and sang…
of all things, what I’d come to think of as our song.”
 “I’ve been hearing a song in my heart forever.”



“How do you know that my truth is yours?”
 “Because I’ve been hearing that song in my heart forever.”



  I find myself wondering what Jesus would have done, 
not that I’m going to believe...

You know, I read a couple of comments about this not being a "clean" book. Well, many times our life, indeed, is not clean... When you stop to think about it, can you really love and thank God if He's never cleansed you of whatever "dirt" may come your way, oftentimes of no fault of your own. This is an amazing story...Don't allow yourself to be turned away by those who will not recognize that Christ died because none of us are "clean..." until we know Him.

GABixlerReviews 

Watch for the second story next...
Note: I substituted a song...Home Again (my only contribution to the sound track...LOL)