Short story Challenge - Beginning to Write - Open Memoir: Emotionally Damaged - Appendix

I've done a lot of writing in my life, but mostly business related--letters, reports, analytical studies. But I've never considered myself to be a writer of stories... Probably because I'd rather read them than write them...LOL... But, once in a while, mostly when given a challenge, as was done with this story, I'll take a try... What do you think?

This was my first attempt for a new group calling for the creation of a story from a first line at an older site, Gather.Com, in 2008.

The cool breeze flowed around her, soothing her frazzled nerves. Shelly had just had one of the worse days of her middle-aged life! Not only had she had to take care of her own 1st grade class, she had been forced to care for the 2nd grade class as well. Trading off personal days was not one of the decisions for which she had voted, but with the new principal trying to gain favor; she was caught in "majority rules" status.

Fortunately Hank had been wonderfully helpful, as usual. He had already rolled back the large dividing partition between classes, set up the movable chalkboards in the middle of the larger room, and had even rearranged the chairs when he had cleaned so that they faced toward the larger front of the lecture hall. Now as she sat, enjoying her freedom, she smiled and thought I think Hank might have a crush on me!

Now that she was able to look back at her day, she decided that it had been unusual enough that she shouldn't blame what had happened on the new policy. After all, when the Taylor twins were sent to school when they weren't feeling well, that had started the problem! When they both took a turn for the worse and vomited right as they were coming through one of the doors to the room, they couldn't be scolded. 

And even though she had called Hank right away to help clean up, while she took care of the girls; they hadn't acted fast enough to prevent four of the second graders from running through the halls into the room, only to go sliding across the room as each ran into the vomit! Fortunately, most of the regurgitation had been water with a little bit of tea because the twins had not wanted any breakfast. Still the boys screamed, "Gross, Yuk! Get me out of here!" as well as some words they had undoubtedly heard outside of her classroom--thank you very much!

And all of that, of course, set the other children laughing and calling out torturous taunts to those getting up off the floor, their clothes a mess, their handprints on the walls and anything else they touched before they stood.

The only good thing about all of that was that Sara, her friend and the School Secretary had heard the commotion and ran to the room offering help. She quickly saw the problem, herded the boys to take to the nurses' office and then to call their parents if they needed to leave school due to being hurt or to change clothes! The twins were already in the nurse's office and were sure to be sent home.

Thankfully, after that catastrophic beginning, the children settled down to work, even though Hank was there in front of the room, cleaning up the mess that had been made. Now, as she sat at her desk, drinking the coffee that Hank had thoughtfully brought her from the teachers' lounge, she watched him and laughed. He had brought back a magazine he'd found in the lounge and was waving it back and forth, creating the gentle breeze that was soothing her.

"Hank, I don't know how to thank you for helping me through the day!"

"It was my pleasure, Shelly; I like to help out whenever I can."

"How did you happen to start working here, Hank. I remember you used to go to the same high school as I did, but then, didn't you leave town?"

"Yes, right after I graduated. You may not know it, but I won a scholarship that year and I left right away to study to become a teacher. It really was the only way I could ensure I was financially able to get my degree."

"Why, no, I didn't know that--that's wonderful! And have you been able to finish your teaching degree?"

"Oh, yes," Hank laughed. I worked my way through and I was already teaching in Illinois. But, my mother got sick and needed me home after my father died. I took this job to get to know the school and submit my application. Now I'm waiting..."

"Waiting?"

"Yes, I was told confidentially that there would be a teaching vacancy and that they would be very interested in my applying for the position. You may have heard by now that Mr. Rosenbaum will be leaving this year. But what you don't know is that I'll be taking over his 4th grade class!"

Not able to handle her surprise, Shelly merely responded with a gigantic smile and said, "Really?"

"Yes, and I've been wondering, would you like to help me celebrate my new job by having dinner with me tonight?"

As Hank continued to send his cooling breeze around her, Shelly knew her frazzled nerves were gone and laughingly responded, "Can we go now?!"

As I read this story again, getting it ready to post, I have to laugh--you see, the story setting was a classroom...which I was dealing with routinely when I was working... So it is true, that if you know enough to write about a location, then it makes the story easier to develop...

I had begun to manage a classroom environment of over 250 rooms spread across three different campus locations: Downtown, Evansdale and the Medical Center. This included scheduling all classes that used what we called general-purpose. That is, any class could be taught there because they didn't need any specialized equipment. A chalkboard, teacher's station and the seating for students was standardized in each room. A screen was normally also included, but the equipment was carried in. We did have a requirement to provide for accessibility, as needed.

It was my job to begin to better utilize those rooms. I began by learning which departments were housed in each building, getting to know the size of classes that would normally be taught by the instructor. For instance, a normal class size for English would be about 25-30. Normally, if at all possible, I would merely assign/confirm the room that had been used and again requested from previous semesters.

The challenge began when I started using hours that were normally not taught. Early morning classes and late afternoon classes were avoided for obvious reasons, but that meant that the rooms sat empty for those hours... 

At the beginning, all of the scheduling was created manually and in response to the individual from academic departments that handled their class schedule to be taught for any given semester. We would normally be working on three different semesters at any given time. It was my job to begin to negotiate a wider spread of their classes across the day. It was fun, for the most part...

Especially when I could say, upon being asked what I do at the university, I would say "I tell the students where to go..." A little ornery, but cute, don't you think?

Hashtag: Emotionally Damaged, PTSD, Nightmare, Open Memoir Appendix

 

I woke with a jerk this morning, breathing a little harder than normal... It happened in the last sleep of the morning, after earlier reading, again, from Acts... Paul and others were going out into the towns and cities--names I'd never heard of--and was telling of Jesus, as Savior... Many believed; many didn't and they sent God's teachers from their area...

When I sat on the side of my bed this morning, realizing that I'd had a mixed-up dream again...of negative thoughts...of my mind pulling out normal things or even happy things that had been part of my life yesterday... and I heard in my left ear, from high up somewhere--Be Not Dismayed. It was a whisper. Was it from the Holy Spirit or just my memory... I find that I was now again emulating, Doubting Thomas, the apostle with whom I most closely identify... When I am afraid, scared, insecure, my emotionally damaged brain is incited...

Usually, in the past when it was closer to my being on the job, it would be job related... For instance, going back to my earlier years of office work, I may spend the night filing...or collating a report...or, you know, some tedious part of a job that is boring while it is a necessary task... Often these past days, as I heard about the ridiculous judge who has no business even being in her job, in my opinion, again held up the work of the Department of Justice... So, looking back, I knew that I was thinking during th day, when I heard the latest on the appeal, I remembered that my first job--at 18--was taking care of employee records--and handling everything needed to get everybody on the payroll and in the system... If, I, at 18, did my job, knowing that these records were to be kept confidential and...secured...how could anybody, sane, try to make people realize that a man, around my age, could NOT know he had committed a crime by taking top secret records out of the secured government files?! That irritation could have set me off in a nightful of filing...LOL

I laugh, but it really isn't funny, is it? The first think I saw when, after feeding my babies, I turned to the computer to write this, as it was fresh in my mind...and I knew that I would at least spend a page or two in my Memoir, writing and sharing my experience, in the event there might be somebody out there who would then learn about how dreams can affect you...negatively...

Of course, Google was reminding us to vote! And I grabbed the pic so that I, too, can remind people... I cannot believe that, in the United States, the past president and his followers has made it so much of an issue, that all of us are now totally insecure--will MY vote be handled properly?!!! Logically, I try to tell myself that things will be worked out...but... when the corrupt keep telling you what to expect, well, doesn't a little bit of your logical mind...believe they could do it?  Truthfully, it is my opinion, that so much of what the republicans are doing, from within congress, and as leaders of states--trafficking those who seek asylum--into parts unknown without any words of kindness or concern...purely as an attempt at political gain...is certainly enough to wear anybody's state of peace down... So, don't be afraid to allow the child in each of us, to dwell in that part of us who becomes afraid...and...act! Realize that peace if available to you!

And tell yourself, over and over...until you believe...And then,

One of the reasons that I was worried, flustered yesterday was because neither of my helpmates had come...and I had garbage that needed to be taken to the road... If I were doing it, I would use the car...it is that far... But, this soon after the hip surgery, I was still not sure I could get the bags into the car and out again. So, I was feeling helpless, irritated at my own lack of ability to do something that should have been routine...

And then a cousin said just three words..."I told you..." 

While at the same time, I was worried about getting my roof fixed or replaced but not really dealing with it... either one place didn't do what I wanted to have done...or didn't return my calls...

And, oh, one more "little" thing... I have been using food again as a comfort tool...

Soooooo, drumroll, please... This is the story my emotionally damageed self dreamed up for me...

I was at the home of a cousin (her son was named Paul) but was not the cousin that had once "touched me." Yet, nevertheless it was Paul telling me that he had just the thing I wanted... While, I was going through the refrigerator and cupboards, looking for a little kitten who was wrapped in a cloth, apparently lost from its mother, and I needed to find something for him to eat... eat...yes... I needed to eat, and so we all decided to order pizza... which arrived with only cheese...which started up an argument about who eats pizza with just cheese...while the delivery person was asking to be paid and nobody had any money, even though I had not ordered it, I went looking for my purse for money, explaining how I had money from recently being at the bank for something for Mom (my mother died years ago, as has the cousin who owned the house I was staying in...) and suddenly I looked up and a big delivery truck was outside the house backing up... and I watched, waving, as the truck plowed right into a car behind them where a man and woman had to run to get out of the way to escape being hit... Then realizing he couldn't proceed, for of course, the wrecked car was in front of him, he started to turn and back up...directly into the front part of the house! And, then the driver got out...yes, that happens all the times when we deliver, sorry about that, no big deal...but I got to get going... (sound like any of the liars we are all hearing these days)...got a delivery to make you know...

And that's when Stevie jumped on my bed and I woke up again...

And that, my friends, is how a muddled mind, crammed with negative vibes, concerns, and issues that should never become so impossible to handle that you are unable to do anything but call them...a nightmare... from an emotionally damaged mind... 

By the way, Stevie, a mother cat who has been my best buddy for years not, had been outside while I was getting back to walking after the surgery... One day earlier this week, Rachel, my caring niece, had taken me to the grocery store. As we were driving into the cabin, Rachel called out...Stevie is carrying a kitten back to th cabin (she had been somewhere near the other end of my driveway). Perhaps because it had been raining so much... Or perhaps because she realized that, soon, she would not have enough milk to feed her growing kittens...

Stopping there, for an aside story, Stevie, one night, climbed up on the screen on the window where I was watching television, and cried and cried... I knew there was dry food out so I didn't try to help...Apparently, she had her kittens that night. If I had known, I would have let her in...I normally have a box ready for her since she wants me around when she begins to birth...When she wasn't there the next morning when I was putting the food out, I realized and felt bad...I wasn't there for her when she needed me... 

This morning, when she bound up on my bed, I just started playing and talking with her... Somehow she had carried the four kittens down that long driveway to the door... When she brought the first one back, Rachel had opened the door while I was still slowly getting out of the car. Stevie ran in and went to a corner and disappeared... Apparently she had scoped out a place when she had visited me during the past weeks...

As soon as she was let out to go for another kitten, Rachel tried to find the kitten, while I got a box ready with a small blanket. Rachel couldn't find the cat... So...the next time she came in, we planned to stop her--not a chance! She zoomed past and again disappeared! A Mystery! Neither of us could solve as Rachel looked under cupboards, behind furniture... She had previously closed off some of the places that cats could sneak behind, knowing that one or the other would sometimes fly by me when I opened the door...

While Stevie was outside again, because we didn't know how many she had, I was planning, thinking... Well, I had stored two suitcases in that corner. I used the suitcases to store my off-season clothes since I have moved into the cabin that had very little storage space. With the rain, and perhaps because of my health, I was feeling chilly often and, instead of turning on the heat, I decided to wash some sweat clothes that I wear in colder times, and ask Rachel to lift one of the cases onto the dining table... And started to remove clothes, shaking them out, to wash... And, there, nestled between my clothes were the kittens! 

By that time, Stevie was back with a third kitten! She looked at Rachel standing there and me standing near the table...and she zoomed past...back into the corner... Thankfully, we had the box ready for her and she jumped in... I handed the two kittens to Rachel, to help Stevie begin to trust her too, and when the two kittens were in the box with the third one, she settled down and washed off the smell of those who had touched her babies! LOL

But soon, she was out of the box and standing at the door... One more was to be brought into the warm house...and she knew that anytime she was hungry, all she had to do was come running into my room, jumped on the bed...and she had trained me to get up and give her food...

Ahhhh, living with a cat with whom you are simpatico, is truly a wonderful life... just like...

A God Incident - A New Song for Me to Love!

I Am About My Father's Business

Even Emotionally Damaged

Until

His Presence Returns in Another New Song

Reflecting My Own Happiness