By Irene Vilar
Somewhere shortly after I began to read Impossible Motherhood: Testimony of an Abortion Addict by Irene Vilar, I turned to the back to see if there was an author picture. Such a beautiful woman, but with large sad eyes, even in this photo. As I read about her marriage, I wanted to alternatively "shake" her for allowing her husband to treat her so, and then "hug" her tightly as her mother and/or grandmother should have.
There is no doubt that a young 15-year-old woman who begins an affair with a much older man is searching for "something." There is both an honest account of her life with her husband, as well as a follow-up analysis of what was happening to her. Even though she later separated from her husband and went into the same type of defeating relationship with another man, by that time, Irene was already addicted--to abortion as a means of control.
Irene places her life within her cultural background. This is most significant--and not so significant. A need for women to gain some control over their own life has been documented for all women, not just one culture. I must say though that the activities about using the women in Puerto Rico to test drugs are a devastating reality that we must never forget! When will the time come when profits for corporations are no longer more important than people?
Childhood for Irene included her mother leaving the home in her early years. Two of her brothers were drug addicts, one dying from his abuse. Her father was a quiet alcoholic and while he seemed to be "there" for the family, his loss of his wife deeply affected the entire family.
When Irene was 15, she was allowed to go to the United States to begin college. As an intelligent woman, but young enough to be "moldable," she became the mistress of her professor. I can think of no other words to describe him than as narcissistic and selfish! In essence, he wanted his freedom above all else, wanted Irene to financially carry her own weight and had no desire to have children, making that quite clear but forcing Irene to be the one to deal with birth control.
Thus began the cycle. Irene could become pregnant, because she wanted children, but would abort within the time allowed legally...only to ignore her birth control pills or take them sporadically, until she was once again pregnant.
It is arrogance beyond belief what her husband did "in support of his freedom!"
It is stupidity beyond belief to allow it to happen...unless there are psychological issues that press someone into this type of self-destructive behavior. Irene Vilar freely shares her innermost feelings about her husband and others in her life. Many women become stupid when faced with things they cannot control, including myself!
I am so thankful that women are beginning to open up about sexuality and its impact on their personal life. God alone knows how many women are facing some type of psychological issue/result from sexual-related issues; and there are few, if any, church-supported actions created to help women with the terrible abuse they face.
If you have the least feeling for women's issues in the United States and other countries, you owe it to yourself to read this book. It is not fiction; it is a reality that must be explored and discussed...YOU must discover this for yourself!
G. A. Bixler